The "If All Else Fails" Option
Location: ER in Abbeyville talking to a patient's foster mom. Patient(~2 years old) has a very rare genetic syndrome(less than 5 living cases currently). She's getting ready to spend another night with him in the hospital, I was passing by her room and she looked dead tired so I stopped by to perform my very "important" role:
Me: "Would you like some juice or something..."
Mom: Sipping her juice "Everytime we come here everyone is just so nice to us. But honestly though...I think they just want to study him. All the doctors start popping in and paging each other incase someone missed the show the last time we were here"
Me: "I don't blame them...it's pretty intriguing that he's the only one in the whole US with the syndrome. But taking care of him must be so much work"
Mom: "Well I wouldn't have adopted him if he wasn't classified as adoptable"
Me: "Yeah...makes sense, but you're doing such a great job"
Mom: "Thanks...but honestly, after him, I'm done with foster kids. Except I go to Africa to adopt. There are so many kids over there that need a good family and anyways, that's what Oprah said we should do now"
Me: "Ohh" wow Miss Oprah is more powerful than I thought "But please lay off the Madonna stunts"
Mom: "Mhmmm...by the way, what do you want to be eventually?"
Me:"A doctor"
Mom: "What kind?"
Me:"Not really sure, I don't have to decide for another 3 or so years..."
Mom:"But you have to have an idea..."
Me:"Ok if you insist...for the last few weeks, I've been wanting to be a neurologist" At this point I go into a spiel about how I would love to do surgery if I get a chance, but need time for family and fun blah blah blah "...but as of now I'm still scared of the potential debt I will be incuring in school"
Mom: "Oh you need money for med school?
Me: "Yup a whole lot..."
Mom: "Just send Oprah an email"
Me: ::Very confused look gradually creeping up on my face::
Mom: "Shooo I did it"
Drafting a hypothetical email in my head:
"Dear Oprah,
How are you? And how is Chicago?(geez..sounds cheesy already) Hope Stedman is doing good too. You see I don't really watch your show-it comes on way too early in the day but if I could, I really would(my letter would be officially tossed out at this point)-and you did a great job with that school in South Africa, if I could go to high school all over again, I would surely bust my butt to get in, but I guess it's only for poor South African orphans. I don't mean to sound like an ingrate, everything done to benefit Africa is good, but why does everything have to happen in South Africa...they're like the most developed Sub-Saharan African country, but that's OK it's probably the Mandela factor and I respect that.
I'll cut to the chase and acknowledge the elephant in the room...
Can you hook a sista up with 250Gs for med school? Haa faave!!
Sorry I'm getting carried away...
Why do I need your help you might ask? Well I have not saved the world...yet, it's on the agenda though, I have not swam across a river filled with hungry alligators to save myself from warring rebels, I know you tend to like stories of overcoming hardships like that...but would you use my normal childhood against me?? It reminds me of the time I went to a free clinic and was turned away for HAVING INSURANCE even after explaining that I was UNDERINSURED. One of the few times I could actually afford to purchase some meagre insurance policy and it was used against me? Sorry, weak analogy. Oh AND, with the change from the loan, I could get TiVo, record your show and watch it when I get back from school. Touche.
I'm sure you are just dying to meet me after this outstanding email...never mind, I'll be in Chicago on val's day and I won't hesistate to stop by your studio toput some pressure on meet you in person.
School starts in about 6 months(HINT HINT)
Thanks and keep up the good work,
"Not-so-Poor-African-Kid that really wants to be a doctor"
***************************************************************
Seriously though...who thinks of doing that??
Me: "Would you like some juice or something..."
Mom: Sipping her juice "Everytime we come here everyone is just so nice to us. But honestly though...I think they just want to study him. All the doctors start popping in and paging each other incase someone missed the show the last time we were here"
Me: "I don't blame them...it's pretty intriguing that he's the only one in the whole US with the syndrome. But taking care of him must be so much work"
Mom: "Well I wouldn't have adopted him if he wasn't classified as adoptable"
Me: "Yeah...makes sense, but you're doing such a great job"
Mom: "Thanks...but honestly, after him, I'm done with foster kids. Except I go to Africa to adopt. There are so many kids over there that need a good family and anyways, that's what Oprah said we should do now"
Me: "Ohh" wow Miss Oprah is more powerful than I thought "But please lay off the Madonna stunts"
Mom: "Mhmmm...by the way, what do you want to be eventually?"
Me:"A doctor"
Mom: "What kind?"
Me:"Not really sure, I don't have to decide for another 3 or so years..."
Mom:"But you have to have an idea..."
Me:"Ok if you insist...for the last few weeks, I've been wanting to be a neurologist" At this point I go into a spiel about how I would love to do surgery if I get a chance, but need time for family and fun blah blah blah "...but as of now I'm still scared of the potential debt I will be incuring in school"
Mom: "Oh you need money for med school?
Me: "Yup a whole lot..."
Mom: "Just send Oprah an email"
Me: ::Very confused look gradually creeping up on my face::
Mom: "Shooo I did it"
Drafting a hypothetical email in my head:
"Dear Oprah,
How are you? And how is Chicago?(geez..sounds cheesy already) Hope Stedman is doing good too. You see I don't really watch your show-it comes on way too early in the day but if I could, I really would(my letter would be officially tossed out at this point)-and you did a great job with that school in South Africa, if I could go to high school all over again, I would surely bust my butt to get in, but I guess it's only for poor South African orphans. I don't mean to sound like an ingrate, everything done to benefit Africa is good, but why does everything have to happen in South Africa...they're like the most developed Sub-Saharan African country, but that's OK it's probably the Mandela factor and I respect that.
I'll cut to the chase and acknowledge the elephant in the room...
Can you hook a sista up with 250Gs for med school? Haa faave!!
Sorry I'm getting carried away...
Why do I need your help you might ask? Well I have not saved the world...yet, it's on the agenda though, I have not swam across a river filled with hungry alligators to save myself from warring rebels, I know you tend to like stories of overcoming hardships like that...but would you use my normal childhood against me?? It reminds me of the time I went to a free clinic and was turned away for HAVING INSURANCE even after explaining that I was UNDERINSURED. One of the few times I could actually afford to purchase some meagre insurance policy and it was used against me? Sorry, weak analogy. Oh AND, with the change from the loan, I could get TiVo, record your show and watch it when I get back from school. Touche.
I'm sure you are just dying to meet me after this outstanding email...never mind, I'll be in Chicago on val's day and I won't hesistate to stop by your studio to
School starts in about 6 months(HINT HINT)
Thanks and keep up the good work,
"Not-so-Poor-African-Kid that really wants to be a doctor"
***************************************************************
Seriously though...who thinks of doing that??
posted by ABBEY | 6:01 PM
5 Comments:
This was cute. As we sit and wait for a winter storm to occur here in MD. I bid you good day. But A girl where have you been? Oprah influences the stock market etc. or have you forgotten the Texas fiasco when the cattlemen sued her for folks stop eating red meat. But God! You’ll get all your monies one way or another. TRUST! Blessings on you always. Everyone’s Aunt
James 1:5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.
James 1:6 But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.
James 4:2 Ye lust, and have not: ye kill, and desire to have, and cannot obtain: ye fight and war, yet ye have not, because ye ask not.
James 4:3 Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.
I just wanna know if that Mom actually got any money from Oprah cause I don't see why she told you that, and ummm clearly if Oprah said jump, she would ask, how high, when, how often etc. etc. LOL This was cute. How's the natural hair transition coming along?
If Oprah has an email addy and does receive emails, does it cost you anything to send one? Now, think of it figuratively - it's possible there is a source you could apply to for funding but you may think that the probability of getting it is practically nil, what this means is - GO ON and SHOOT.
I know someone who schooled in an IVY League college in the States. Guess what? He sent in his application after the deadline had passed. He sat down, composed a mail to the school asking if he could send in an application even though the deadline had passed. And they replied "yes" so he sent in the application and got the admission. Sometimes I think about it, what if he hadn't sent the mail? oh, did I mention this guy was resident in Naija which you would think was disadvantageous...
@ aunt: yup the lady is one powerful woman, i completely forgot about the whole TX fiasco!
@anon: all the mom told me was that she got a reply saying they were going to look into her case and that she was doing a great job with the kids. So dunno if she's going to get the money eventually. And as for the natural hair...its still under my braids right now. Procrastinating taking them out cus I'm scared for what lies beneath!!
@ gramps: i know it is possible to actually get the money by some weird chance. I'm usually someone to try everything possible but I don't feel comfortable doing this one in particular...can't explain why
Hey hey hey...I was once considering writing Oprah for money so my parents can do like a real white wedding...or money so they could do something. Oprah's rich, it's a very plausible things lol. And I definitely agree with you about time to have a family and wanting to be a surgeon. I feel the exact same way.
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